Last updated: April 30. 2014 9:56AM - 993 Views
By Scott Ballard District Attorney

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This has been one of those weeks when I’m after 9 p.m getting home every night.

On Monday and Wednesdays I teach a business law class at Georgia Military College in Fairburn. On Tuesday night I waited tables as a fundraiser for Prevent Child Abuse. Thursday night I taught a two-hour class for the Griffin Police Department’s citizen’s police academy.

I’ve had a blast. But, I’m not as young as I used to be and I’ve been looking for a chance to idle down.

So, yesterday I went to the house to pick up my wife for lunch. We try to do that when we can.

On the way I saw that I had a call from John Wright, one of our investigators in the Griffin office. I tried to call him back.

And that began a 15-minute period of frustration that nearly put me in the looney bin.

My iPhone went haywire. I guess I’ve dropped it one time too many.

I could hear John, but he couldn’t hear me. So, I hung up and tried again. This time it tried to dial him on Facetime. That was a disaster. I never did get to talk to John.

By now I had arrived home. My wife wasn’t there. And it didn’t matter, because I couldn’t get into the house anyway. A worker was replacing the steps to the only door for which I had a key.

So, I tried to call my wife. My phone called my son instead. On Facetime, no less. That failed, so my son texted me, requesting that I call him. I tried and this time he received the call. Only my phone began maniacally dialing random numbers as we tried to talk. Eventually it shut down.

Have you ever wondered how far you can throw a phone?

Things could be worse.

I have a former prosecutor who needed a break. So he left us and went in a camper by himself to New Mexico.

Last week he got as far as Arizona when he ran over three nails. Three flat tires.

He fixed them and made it to the campsite. He tried to connect to the sewer port. It didn’t work.

So he crawled under the camper to check on the problem.

That’s when the hose burst.

Have you ever wondered how far you can throw a camper?

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